2003-03-13 - 3:14 p.m.

But alas, all of this seems long past as I have been ill with the flu for FIVE DAYS! Ewwww I'm totally grossing myself out! I haven't even been out of the house, except to go to the hospital, in FIVE DAYS. I've had to take FIVE DAYS off work at the busiest time. I've never been so sick in my life!

But Larissa has patiently nursed me and waited on my hand and fevered foot, and I'm feeling better today. Except I feel bad for having been such a slob and a drain on my friends - the house is a mess! and I'm sure everyone thinks I'm lazy and being fake sick, when really, until today, it was all i could do to open my eyes or lift my sweaty head off the pillow. And I feel bad because I've been pissy too, and I hate treating my friends badly. I will have to think of something really wonderful to make it up to them.

Dean's coming into town tonight and this weekend is his birthday. I'm so excited! Of course, I've been sick, so I haven't had a chance to prepare for his birthday at all, but I'm going to do my darndest to make it a special one for him.

My mom says there are 78,000 troops in Tulcea County, Romania, where she is. That the war is supposedly going to start there, with planes and bombs coming from Romania (since Turkey isn't quite our partner). This doesn't make the news. My poor mom is now in the danger zone. I can only pray that all of the American military in Romania will bring money to the Romanian economy, and help to the orphans. Every cloud has to have a silver lininig - I have to believe my mom is there for a reason, and I have to believe I'm not a loser and there's a reason I am here on this planet, and in this country too. I don't know what it is exactly, but when the fever leaves my body, perhaps the veil will be lifted and I will know.