2003-02-27 - 1:26 p.m.

It's amazing how good a little writing action actually makes me feel. It's not that I put it off (although at times I do) it's that since I have no prompts or deadlines, I don't really write until that particular vibe hits me and then

*BAM*

I am compelled, and writing is compulsory - and it seems to come from everywhere and no where and needs no editing. Only the fuel of coffee and cigarettes.

This happens very infrequently, but it has happened to me this week, and wow, it just makes me feel like a million bucks! Because it makes me feel like *I still got it* and it reminds me of how creative I can actually be, but mostly it reminds me that

There are things in this life that I actually truly always ENJOY. That NEVER get old.

All of this, and all I wrote was a little short story! But it is really rockin my bootie right now. POW.

The story is based on my experience with Dean the other week -- It's about a couple who take mushrooms and then go through a trip like we did - In the story, the couple actually do recognize each other as spiritual beings from before they were born into human bodies, and they are soul-mates from hyperspace (sort of. Of course I write much better in my short stories than in my diary!)

But of course, humans were never meant to have such knowledge and so when she comes down from her trip, there is a tragic ending. I don't want to reveal it, lest I spoil the surprise of someone reading this who later wants to read my story.

It feels good to write tragic endings. This may be part of my black clothes wearing/cure listening/ camus reading core self who developed in highschool. I've changed most everything in my life over the years, but that has remained constant. Life can be very ugly. But even in the midst of tragedy there can be beauty and hope.

My middle name is Hope. For real.

Gotta jet. I'm at work.