2000-09-19 - 02:49:50

Larissa took me shopping for Sari's at this Indian clothing store the other day -- and I came home with 2 new beautiful ones, one is a dull green with designs that remind me of underwater life, and the other is lavender with designs that remind me of flowering meadows. I helped Larissa buy a red silk Sari that she really wanted, and in exchange she gave me one of her old ones which I have always admired -- its a red-mauve color. Each sari is just a beautiful peice of cloth about 4 feet wide and 12 feet long, and my plan is to clothe the bareness of my walls with them, or maybe hang one as curtains over my windows. Looking at these saris the last few days as the fabric is draped over my bookshelf has really brought me joy, because they are symbols to me of the new life I will be living on my own-- My new life is going to be rich and vibrant and exotic and all mine. Larissa will be moving all her stuff out a couple of days before we actually leave on our trip, so she has offered to help me decorate the apartment before she goes -- and that thought warms me.

I've been thinking lately alot of Vancouver, I guess because it was this time last year that we left and I spent all last fall there. The more I think about my life the more I think I will stay here through next spring and not go to Boulder after all, because the money I will be making from this job if I save it in the next year will allow me to take time off later, and will help me put my life in order. So I'm thinking now I will stay here through the spring (which is the only really beautiful time in Atlanta) and then go live with my dad in the summertime (It's been years since I was in Vancouver in the summer, and it is paradise on earth then)and then leave with my mom for Romania in August. This way I will be able to save the most money, see my Dad and enjoy him and Vancouver for a good long amount of time, and then when I go to Romania I will have enough to spend several months or a year living modestly there and traveling in Eastern Europe . . . After that, who knows?

I spend alot of my time planning for the future I know, but I've been feeling lately like the best way for me to be is like a train -- with a place to arrive (a purpose) and right now in my mind I'm laying the track for that -- and soon I will be putting myself into motion . . . That's all you really need in life, purpose and motion . . .As long as you enjoy your life along the way (the journey IS the destination)